fThis year I'd like to try something new. I'd like to share an article or blog post that I think is interesting, has important information for birthing families to consider, or is just plan awesome. I think this one falls into the important information range. Birth Stories.
As a part of the generation that grew up watching shows like "A Birth Story" on TLC I seriously FEARED childbirth. My own birth story was one of a long (50+) labor that ended in an emergency cesarean. To add a bit more drama, my mother often tells of looking over at me from the operating table and watching my little body heave, trying to catch my first breath, and then stop. And in her words, I was "whisked away."
When I look back at my first pictures, I see a fragile baby with tubes attached to it's body, flushed palms and feet with pale skin.
I determined that when I got pregnant that I would avoid all of that drama and go straight into the OR for a beautiful, forgettable cesarean birth resulting in a nice, round headed child.
It wasn't until much later that I realized that a cesarean section wasn't "easy", but that it was major surgery. Basic knowledge of anatomy teaches us that! So I learned about birth, considered becoming a midwife and decided that I wanted to be a doula.
One of the first questions I ask my clients is to tell me birth stories they've heard. And while some of them tell stories of cesarean births and others of blissed out natural births, it's how we tell stories that it's important. And the understanding that no two births are the same.
There are benefits to hearing "good" birth stories where mothers feel empowered and partners are connected. Hearing more of these stories, I think, over stories of panic, pain, and fear, are a vital step to creating the births moms and birthing people want. Life happens, births can veer off course, but in the span of human existence it's only been in the past few decades that we've dis-empowered women and our ability to give birth. Let's take our power back, trust our bodies and trust birth.
I'm thrilled to share a site I recently found called Good Birth Stories. Below is a snippet from a positive birth story. I hope you enjoy.
Vanessa’s story – Matheo’s birthThe Spanish phrase for ‘give birth’ is, brilliantly, ‘dar a luz’ (give light to). I gave light to Mathéo Zen at 7.30pm on a late May evening in St George’s hospital in Tooting, London.
The room on the delivery ward was luminous with mellow evening sun and crackling with energy; the air iron heavy with the raw smell of blood. I’d used hypnotherapy and my sheer bloody-mindedness to achieve a birth of my first baby that was natural, vaginal, drug-free (except gas and air – woohoo!) and seeing our miniature creature on the outside for the first time was mind-blowing.
He was the softest thing I’d ever touched; a tiny peach; deliciously creamy and a little bit fuzzy all over. He had come in his own sweet time and was very pleased with himself indeed. He was calm, bright as a button, and he seemed to suckle contentedly – if painfully, but that’s another story – when I put him to the breast.
One of the things I often hear is that doulas cost a lot of money.
And I get it.
When you see a one-time, often up-front price ranging from hundreds to thousands of dollars, it can be intimidating. Add to that the fluctuation of prices from doula to doula, and the process can become overwhelming.
So why are we so expensive? Truthfully, we're not. I say that as a person who would gasp (okay, maybe faint) whilst forking over a thousand dollars (or more) for a doula when my time comes.
So where does your doula fee go?
Experience and Training
Most parents who are looking to hire a doula start with where she was trained as well as how much experience she has. Doulas who have been through multiple trainings and have attended a great deal of births tend to charge more for their experience. But, that's not to say that a doula who has only attended a few births doesn't also charge "market price" for her services. While most of the money we earn for births goes towards logistics (more on that later), a chunk of it (at least for me) goes towards advanced training. This ultimately makes for better doulas.
The average cost of doula training is about $600, though I have seen it higher for week-long retreat-style trainings. Postpartum training can also range between $600-900. If you want to become a Certified Lactation Consultant, trainings can be as much as $900, and if you'd like to take it further to become an Internationally Board Certified Lactation Consultant, testing costs money as well. Becoming certified in Placenta Encapsulation, Child Birth Education, and Essential Oils and Herbs are trainings that most doulas want to add to their business. We earn these certifications and attend trainings based on our income.
Most doulas go on 24/7 call at least two weeks, but sometimes as early as a month before the time of a client's Estimated Due Date. This means they are essentially "on the clock" 24 hours a day. If I divided my current doula fee* of $850 by two weeks, I would average about $2.52 an hour without counting the amount of time doulas spend with their clients during their birth. Like most doulas, when a client calls me for their birth, I stay by their side until 2 hours after the baby is born and the parents are settled. This also means that we are not taking new clients. We are usually not going on initial consultations or meetings because we could be called to a birth at any moment. We are committed to our clients.
Gas, Food, Etc.
Doulas pay for their own gas or fare for public transportation to all consultations and prenatal visits. We also make postnatal visits (up to 2, or 3 in some cases) without charging a "postpartum doula fee." While we don't get lunch breaks, we do pay for our food, water, and supplies that we bring to each birth. This can range from books we loan to clients to birthing balls, rebozos, etc.
When a doula goes on call, she/he does so with the knowledge that at any time we could be called for a birth. This means we miss family time, vacations and trips, or nice dinners with our significant others. And when the time comes for baby to be born, we leave our full time jobs (if we work outside of doula-ing), family, and children for an undefined amount of time.
Is it Worth it?
I can't say that for anyone (typical doula answer). The evidence shows that having a doula-attended birth results in less intervention, fewer cases of unplanned c-section, better management of labor pains, shorter labors, and healthier breastfeeding relationships.
Like most doulas, I'm not in it for the money. I do what I do because I'm passionate about it. I love helping people become parents. There is still nothing more awe-inspiring than watching a baby be born. I get a rush from the sheer power and determination of women in labor and nothing beats the smell of amniotic fluid clinging to your clothes. The oxytocin that baby and new parent emit is intoxicating and contagious. I always tell parents that I interview with that they should pick a doula not by how much she costs, or her experience, but by how you feel when you are in her presence. And to my mind, that presence is priceless.
My sister was an addict, so the word "junkie" has always had negative connotations for me. It indicates that someone is powerless to a substance; whether it be drugs, food, alcohol, or anything else that is harmful or does harm.
So, to put "junkie" behind birth? It's just not for me.
I love birth. I remember my first birth like it was yesterday. I was with the mama for almost 48 hours, it was a long induction followed by a long labor followed by quick pushing. Her little one needed to be placed in the NICU for observation so I stayed with her even longer and visited her baby boy.
When I finally got home I was exhausted but alive. I even mentioned to my partner that I smelled like birth. It was then, that I knew I was hooked.
Hooked. There's another possible triggering word, a word with some negative connotations as well, and I used it.
I do have a strong desire to get back into birth work. The move to the Pacific Northwest has been a transitional one and while I have a full time job that is fulfilling me financially, it's not fulfilling me as a person. Only birth work has done that for me.
So am I addicted to birth work? Am I hooked on it? Am I "birth junkie"? I think not, I'm just a woman who wants to live to help other women experience the blissful pleasure that is birth.
Head over to Maiden to Mother to read an article by another doula and the term "birth junkie"
Hi there! I'm Erika Davis and I'm a doula working in the Seattle and South Puget Sound area.